Summary
In this powerful value packed episode Sasha shares a conversation with Gabe Cox; a faith-based author, podcaster, coach, and the founder of Red Hot Mindset. She helps faith-fueled women use their passions to enhance their productivity and spiritual growth so they can go after their God-given goals. As an avid runner, she uses that interest to explore ideas around clarity, goal setting, strategic planning, simplicity, and faith. Her mission is to help women realize their gifts, hone their skills, and get crystal clear on their calling.
Gabe shares a vulnerable testimony about her start to marriage and motherhood and how God shifted her heart and focus. Then Sasha and Gabe share a conversation that covers a vast array of topics including seasons of life & motherhood, self care, balance, goals, peace, proper order and alignment of priorities, and more!
Some major talking points include embracing and honoring the season you’re in, the importance of being an example to your children in the areas of self care and goal setting, how to pursue goals with peace, and what balance actually is.
Get ready to dive in with a notebook and pen ready, because you’re going to be taking notes on these mic drop moments Gabe and Sasha have to share.
Want to connect with Gabe?!
Website: https://redhotmindset.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gabecox_redhotmindset/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/4MindfulMamas
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You’re invited to join us in the Productively Peaceful Moms Club over on facebook! It’s a safe space where we can show up vulnerably and encourage each other, where ere share the mission of being the best mommas we can be through the grace and strength of Jesus Christ, where we encourage consistency and are able to hold each other accountable. We share scripture and talk about podcast episodes and pray for each other and set goals and so much more! You’re more than welcome here, you’re wanted here! https://www.facebook.com/groups/IntentionalAbundance
Transcription
Sasha Star Robertson 0:50
Jingle
Sasha Star Robertson 0:54
Hello, sisters, and welcome back to another episode of the Intentional Abundant Life podcast. I’m your host, Sasha Star Robertson, and I have another special guest here with us today. Her name is Gabe Cox. And she is a faith-based author, podcaster, coach, and the founder of Red Hot Mindset. She helps faith-filled women use their passions to enhance their productivity and spiritual growth so they can go after their God-given goals. As an avid runner, she uses that interest to explore ideas around clarity, goal setting, strategic planning, simplicity, and faith. Her mission is to help women realize their gifts, hone their skills, and get crystal clear on their calling. I love love love that she is going to be on here sharing all of these things that you’re used to hearing about here in this space. So Gabe, welcome. Thank you for being on here. Is there anything else that you would like to add to this powerhouse of a bio?
Gabe Cox 2:15
Sure! Well, Sasha, thank you so much for having me, it’s an honor to be able to chat with you. I was looking forward to it because we do have similar messages. And I love, love, love hearing how God is working in others’ lives as well. So, you know, I’m from Minnesota originally, it’ll be about two years when this podcast airs, that we have been in Colorado, so a little bit more temperate and loving being in the mountains in the warmer weather. But I have three boys, 14, 12, and 8. And I’ve been married for 15 years, love running and writing, and just doing what I feel like God is calling me to do. And so that has been a season of motherhood. And it’s also been a season of understanding that I still have my giftings that He’s given me and I need to be willing to do that alongside motherhood.
Sasha Star Robertson 3:10
Amen. Amen. I completely agree. So you shared in your little application thing that we do that you were coming out of the diapering stage and asked yourself a question and kind of how it brought you on this journey to be where you are today. And I would love to hear more of that. Because diapering stage over here still going on. And I know you have like teenage boys, I’m a boy mom, too. So I would just love to hear you share that part of your story with the listeners because I think a lot of them here might still have little ones, very little ones in the home.
Gabe Cox 3:47
Yeah, I’ll give you some encouragement that this too shall pass. You know, every season does. But I’m going to tell you, I have a 14-year-old, I have a freshman, and it comes through the year actually now by now it’s already done. And time just goes so quickly. So cherish the season you’re in because now I look back and go I have no more babies. I don’t have anyone who wants to cuddle because boys don’t want to cuddle at a certain point. Like, they’re still mommy’s boys, but yeah, when I was honestly let me be honest with you. I never wanted to get married. And I never wanted to have kids. So that was just me. I was very independent. Going to go do my own thing. I was in broadcast journalism and all the things. So God called me to marriage pretty early on, I found out about you know, I got married right outside of college. And I was like, What? No, I was content being single and all these things. And within a year I found out we were having our first kid and I was like, what? Okay.
Gabe Cox 4:47
But it’s so cool how God changes your heart in every season because as soon as I found out I was pregnant, I was so excited. And I was like okay, I’m called to motherhood and I’m going to love this. But you know motherhood stages are hard, and every stage is different. And it’s all hard and good and rewarding because we learned so much. But when I was in the diapering stage, I would say I wasn’t a big fan of the baby stage, because I like when they’re independent. Now I love having conversations with my boys and, and just seeing the independence that they have in the gifting coming out and other things. But it feels lonely in that stage, even when you’re surrounded by people, you can just feel really alone. And I kind of lost myself in a way. I lost who I was and who God called me to be.
Gabe Cox 5:36
Now, I don’t… I want to preface this by saying, I don’t ever take being a mom for granted because I think that was the greatest mission that God ever gave me. So not saying that. But at the same time, I thought, I have to sacrifice everything for my kids to be a mom, I can’t have my own dreams. I can’t have my own interests, I can’t do these things because I have to be the best mom that I can be. And as I was moving out of the diapering stage, I was pretty much asking myself, what’s next, like these kids are a little bit more independent. They don’t need me like they needed me to feed them and clothe them and buckle them into their seats in the car and all the things. And so I started feeling a little lost because they go, What am I going to do with this extra time – which really isn’t that much extra time or anything – But what am I going to do?
Gabe Cox 6:28
And what I really realized, because what I did is I said, Well, I love running. So what if I make a goal out of running and see what I can do with it. And for a while, I felt like that was such a selfish thing. Like I can’t do something for me that I’m taking away from everybody else. You feel so guilty, all that mom guilt. We all have mom guilt, and we have it all the time, no matter what season you’re in. It’s just different. It looks different in each season. But I decided I was going to do something for me but still be a good enough mom and be a good mom.
Gabe Cox 7:00
And what I realized, as I said, Okay, what’s next, I’m gonna have this running goal. And I did it. And I hit it, I wanted to qualify for the Boston Marathon, which is one of the most elite races for everyday runners. It’s a hard goal for most people, and so not very many runners end up hitting. And so when I hit it, what I realized and what God essentially was like, your kids need to see you win. Your kids need to see you go after goals. Because how else are they going to learn to do it? And so He pretty much was saying, You need to be their best example. And if you’re not willing to step out of your comfort zone, if you’re not willing to take risks, you’re not willing to use the gifts I gave you. Then why would you make them do it? You know, you have to walk it first. And I thought that was a really important revelation that He gave me to say, you can have your interest, you can have your goals, and you can be a good mom, too. You don’t have to pick.
Sasha Star Robertson 8:05
Amen. I fully agree with everything that you said. And I love… First, congratulations on doing that. Did you qualify for the Boston Marathon?
Gabe Cox 8:15
I did. Yeah. I qualified back in 2015. And I ran in 2016 and this past year. So 2021 was another victory run for another story another day.
Sasha Star Robertson 8:25
Wow, incredible. I’m doing like a little round of applause over here. That’s great. I just ran my third ever mile in less than 10 minutes. Yesterday, not yesterday, the day before. I am like running is not my thing I would basically do anything else. Typically if I’m running, I’m being chased by a bear or something which has never actually happened. I’m proud of that. But dang Boston Marathon. That’s huge. So congratulations. Like, that’s incredible. I love that you had talked about like, for one, thank you for being vulnerable and transparent, and straightforward with us that you did not want to get married and you did not want motherhood right. But God changes hearts. And you knew when you found out you were pregnant, that you were called to motherhood. And that was like the greatest calling and mission on your life and you took it very seriously to do it well. And I love that and I want to honor you for that as well.
Sasha Star Robertson 9:25
And you’d pointed out that there’s learning in each stage like motherhood is difficult but there’s learning each stage, and I just see motherhood as part of our sanctification process. Our children teach us so much about ourselves, about life, about God, about dependence on Him, and seeking Him daily. So I hear you there fully. And then a couple of other things that you had touched on: your running goal, like you had this idea that I believe so many of us moms do like, That’s selfish. I can’t do that for me. And I do feel like I see a lot of moms that, I don’t feel like I see, I know I see a lot of moms who are like Nope, I’m a mom, this is my only thing. And I just, I like to caution women against that very early on. And I’ve had tons of empty nesters who are like, thank you for doing this. Because I believe even in that diapering stage, we can do exactly what you said, be that example to our kids, be obedient, follow our gifts, step out of our comfort zone to do hard things, and show them that it’s possible and be that example to them.
Sasha Star Robertson 10:38
But so many moms don’t do that even in the state you’re in now. It’s like, I stay at home, I take care of the house, and I homeschool my kids, and I’m there for their every beck and call and need, and then their kids leave the home. And then they don’t know who they are, they don’t have any hobbies or interests, they’ve honestly fallen out of relationship with the Lord and their spouse because their face is just so fully turned towards their children and only their children. And I don’t believe that that is what God asks us to do. And, and I don’t know that that’s really the example that we should be setting for our children. And I say this, especially our daughters, because I’ve had this conversation with my dear friend, she’s 50 Something, several kids, some have grown up and become mothers of their own. And she said back to her mom, now that she’s a mom, thank you so much for, for doing what you’re doing now and taking care of yourself, for her younger siblings that are like not even 10 yet, because she recalls when she was growing up, her mom didn’t have self-care, her mom didn’t take care of herself.
Sasha Star Robertson 11:43
She was in poor health, she was just pouring into her family and sacrificing herself over and over and over again for her family. And she said she’s thankful that she’s able to see the example in her mom now with her younger siblings because she’s a mom to a little one. And, and she was like, I, coming into motherhood, didn’t know, where that balance lay of whether I should be taking care of myself or my kids or like pouring it all out? Or like where’s the fine line of kind of like, the self-care idea and doing something for myself without feeling guilty while still or pursuing my goals? And I think it can be yes, and. And both, which I think you are in alignment with there. So one of the things we wanted to talk about today was the idea of balance and doing both. And so do you want to take it away and share about that?
Gabe Cox 12:35
Yeah. And one thing I was thinking as you were talking is one of the issues that I had, in my seasons, I still kind of have this issue a little bit, but I’ve simplified my life a lot. But I used to think I had to be everything for everyone. And I had to do every role that came my way, every opportunity that the doors opened. I needed to fulfill it because I could and what I learned is I was actually sacrificing my family, my husband, for all these things that I thought I was supposed to do because I was good at them. And God said, No, I called you to this. And sometimes that means I called you to motherhood at this point in that season. Right? And so I started eliminating and just all these different roles that were bogging me down, and I didn’t have balance. That’s one thing I definitely didn’t have. And when I think of balance now, I think of balance as peace. Do I have peace in my life right now? Am I present wherever I am?
Gabe Cox 0:00
And so, for me, If I’m working, I’m going to be present working because then I’m going to be way more productive. I’m going to focus and get it done. When I’m with my family, I want to be present with my family. I want quality time. I want conversation. I want to have some fun and laugh and have memories. And it’s, for me balance is, Am I present where I am, and what does my schedule look like? Am I overdoing it? And sometimes I look at my season I’m like, well, I always said my kids would only have one sport at a time, which they do. However, my older two are competitive gymnasts, and they’re in the gym 25 hours a week. And yeah, so they do two practices a day and practice on Saturday. And so I’m driving all over the place. I’ve become a glorified Uber which is super fun, but I’ve learned to listen to podcasts while I drive and have prayer time and I do… I try and be productive while I’m doing these things because it’s hours of my time, but still, they all only do one thing. But because of the one thing being a big commitment, it becomes an overwhelming thing. And so we can easily slip out of balance.
Gabe Cox 1:16
And so a lot of times when I think of balance, I don’t think of it as work life has to be even with family time and it needs to be even with your leisure time. And it needs to be even with all the things going on in your life. No. Balance is you seeing what season you’re in. And so a lot of your listeners are with young kids right now. And that season means balance might be you actually have to spend a lot more time with your kids. You’re investing a lot of time in motherhood and maybe not working as much. But then there might be a season where balance means you actually have to work a little bit more. And maybe you have a little bit less family time but that’s okay. Because it does even out as long as you’re present in the moment. And knowing that each season is different. And with each season, you have to look at it and go alright, do I have balance? Which eventually says, Do I have peace? And do I have a presence?
Sasha Star Robertson 2:12
Amen. My word of the year last year? Was it last year? Yeah. 2021 My goodness, I keep thinking it’s still 2021 And I’m like no, it’s 2022. 2021 was Shalom. And it’s the Hebrew word for peace. But Shalom is like, it’s so much more than peace. It’s a wholeness like there’s not a crack in the wall. My Word of the Year for 2020 was fulfilled and fulfillment. And to me, it was like I want to be fulfilled not just succeeding in one area of life, but in all areas of life, multiple areas of life. It’s wholeness, and so my husband, he’s the one that says, it’s like Shalom. And so then, funny enough it did change. My word of the year changed. It was Shalom in 2021. And it was. I would just ask myself constantly, is this bringing peace to my life or not? Is this bringing peace or is this bringing chaos? And if it wasn’t peace, I would ask myself and the Lord why? What does that mean? And where do I go from here? What do I do with this?
Sasha Star Robertson 3:18
And I love that you had kind of brought up just the idea that I hold fast to in that good things are not always God things. You know you’re like I was doing all of these things, everything for everyone because this is what I was “supposed to do.” Because I was good at it and whatever else, and it’s what I thought people needed of me. But then you realize, and when you sit down and do… Which, I know you help your clients do just like I do, is sit down and really look at what things in your life are actually distractions. They’re good things but they’re not the things that God is calling you to in this season. And so, definitely being mindful of whatever season you’re in, whether it’s still the diapering stage, whether you’re diapering, multiple kids at home or just coming out of that season, or, or in Homeschooling with lots of competitive gymnasts in your home, you know what kind of different things do you have going on in your life right now?
Sasha Star Robertson 4:13
And I think it’s so important to like you said, look at your schedule and look at your calendar and what is actually on there and what is actually happening. And am I making peace in my life for myself but also making peace for my family? And I think that’s super, super important in bringing up this idea of balance. Everything’s not going to be the same. And like I help a lot of people, I think maybe similar to you to that. When you’re going after those God-given goals and clarifying that calling that he’s put on your life. Sometimes it is outside of your family or in addition to your family. And being able to pursue those things while taking care of your family and your home and your relationship with God and your spouse. Sometimes some things are going to take a little bit of a backseat, they’re going to go on the back burner and just stay warm and not be hot, red hot.
Sasha Star Robertson 5:06
And then sometimes that season looks like you know asking your husband to change a couple of diapers a day or you know do something for the family or for the home so that you can have that little bit extra time to do what God’s calling you to do in the marketplace or in business or sharing your heart and a podcast or, you know, giving a testimony to a friend or whatever it looks like in your life. And so I love that you brought that up because I was thinking this, there’s this meme that’s gone around in terms of equality versus equity, and we talked about this before we hit record, but it’s a picture of you know, these two guys or maybe it’s even three guys and equality or like balance to me when I think of it is everyone gets the same. Like you were talking about doesn’t mean everybody’s you know, everything on your schedule needs to look like equal allotments.
Sasha Star Robertson 5:58
But these men One of them’s very short, one of them’s very tall, and they were each given three boxes to stand on to see over the fence and the short guy with three boxes still can’t see over the fence. But the tall guy, three boxes can, like his knees could see over the fence because he’s so tall. And so instead, that tall guy, maybe giving one or two of his boxes to the short guy. Now they’re both able to see over the fence and I think of that in our schedule too. Relevant to the season that we’re in is that sometimes some things are going to have a few more of those time blocks on your calendar than others. But it’s more… I like the word harmony, like a symphony, because it’s like a dance, right?
Sasha Star Robertson 6:38
Our hormones as women, they do this dance, it’s not always the same, you know, every month, hopefully, month after month, it’s the same but throughout the month things ebb and flow and our temperature adjusts and, and I think our schedules are the same. And I’ve even heard of people doing cycle thinking they sync their calendars and schedules to what’s going on with their body chemistry and Symphony. I think that’s really great though, what you’re talking about. So, any tips? Anything God is showing you in this season of busyness and what you have going on and keeping things simple and focused on peace amongst this chaos has been a common theme here on the podcast.
Gabe Cox 7:21
YES. A couple of things actually. And as we were talking I was thinking about for those drivers out there. If you’re an achiever, your mindset is I gotta be all in. I gotta be 100% at whatever I’m doing, and I used to think that with even goals. I was like, Well, if I can’t be all in, then I’m not gonna go after that. You know if it’s not, if I can’t do it tomorrow, I’m not going to do it. Well, especially as a mom, it’s not possible. You can’t go all in on that and sacrifice your family. Your family comes first. Really in alignment, God comes first, then family, then what else you’re doing right and so there still has to be that alignment and that balance.
Gabe Cox 8:08
But just because you can’t go all in in the season that you’re in, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go after something. It doesn’t mean that, if you have a stirring in your heart, there’s a reason there’s a stirring because God has called us to this mission field. Like as long as we’re here, we have a purpose. And He wants us. He wants to use us. And it’s scary. It’s, you know, sometimes you’re like, oh, I don’t want to do this. It’s, you know, out of my comfort zone. I don’t want to add the extra time. I don’t want to add it to my calendar. But when God calls us and He says go, we go. But it just looks different sometimes because what I realized is that I didn’t have to be all in. Meaning I focused all my time on this energy because sometimes there are people who teach that you have to be thinking about it all the time. You have to write it down and put it in front of you and only think about that one thing.
Gabe Cox 9:00
Now I do think there’s value in writing it down and posting it. However, if you’re focusing all your energy on that, that becomes an idol. So, it’s no longer healthy anyway. But think about it this way. If you take care of yourself in whatever capacity that means for you. Self Care is kind of a sometimes a woofoo word these days too. But if you take care of yourself, meaning you’re doing, you’re making yourself healthy, you’re continuing to be healthy whether that’s working out, maybe you do like going out with friends for coffee or whatever it is that lights you up and fills your soul. That’s important because the more filled you are the more you have to give. And actually like when I… My boys always laugh at me, because when I get crabby, usually they will be like have you gone on a run in a few days? Because that’s what fuels me, it gives me the energy I need. It’s actually time alone with the Lord sometimes too. And so it makes me happy. It gives me that joy, and it gets me ready to be all to everybody when I need to be.
Gabe Cox 10:10
Anyway, so I just wanted to give that encouragement that you don’t have to be all in. You can do five minutes a day, can do a half-hour a day. Whatever it is that you have. But just make sure that you do take that time and you are still with the Lord and going, What is it that You want to do? What desires did you give me, interests did You give me and why? And really contemplate that. And when it comes to the busy season. This year, my word is “simply”.
Gabe Cox 10:38
And we were talking about this a little bit beforehand, Sasha, that I was like I get this word. I’m never going to do these words again because every time I come up with a word, God tests me in this. And He’s testing me again because this first quarter is super busy. And I’ve simplified everything that I can. I simplify my schedule. It just feels busy because we’ve had out-of-town meets for gymnastics. I’m in a program, a class that I’m taking that’s pretty intensive. My work schedule has been quite a bit bigger of a load than normal. And I’m still running my own business and trying to keep the house clean and do all these things.
Gabe Cox 11:20
Now, I will give you a tip. Here’s a tip. As soon as your kids are old enough, give them a chore to do, like give them responsibility because I’m telling you, I vacuum upstairs and make sure the kitchen’s clean. And that’s all I do. For the most part. I mean we do some deep cleaning here and there but my kids have responsibilities and they do it willingly. You know and they don’t get paid for it. They just know they’re a part of the family and they need to help. That is one way to help simplify and to keep that balance because I don’t ever want them to feel entitled either, that they don’t have to do these things. They need to learn these responsibilities, so they can go do it when they’re they’re gone. But when it comes to simply, I had this question that came to me. In December I wasn’t planning on doing a word, but God was saying, I want you to learn how to do things simply.
Gabe Cox 12:09
And so the question that I ask now as I decide to take on a role or when I’m doing my work, okay, so how can I do blank simply? So how can I get this project done simply? Not, you know I still want it done to the best of my availability. How can I do it more simply? How can I you know, take the boys to their activities and do it simply without the stress, you know, to keep that peace and to keep that balance? And I’ve really been encouraged by that because even in this busy season like I said, every season’s different, and this season ended up being busier than I wanted. But I have also realized once I get through this, once I get through the class I’m taking, and once we get through this busy meet season, it’s actually going to help come the next quarter to simplify things even more. It’s going to simplify my business a little bit. It’s going to simplify my workload as I get my systems in order, and as I figure out how to balance those things. And so asking that question, how can I do it more simply?
Sasha Star Robertson 13:19
Yeah, that’s great. And I hear, too, that once this is over, this season is preparing you for the next season. So it might get busy. It might get whatever else, but what you’re doing and learning and implementing now is going to help so greatly in that. I love that you talked about alignment. You talked about right alignment, where it’s God and then family and then your other things. When I think about this I also think about what we talked about earlier when you’re talking about equal portions of your schedule going to everything and this idea of balance. I think it’s important to sit down and write down what is your alignment for all the different areas of life that you have going on? What is the proper order that you would have established for your family time? For taking care of your home, for taking care of your business, for taking care of yourself and your health? And in writing down what they actually look like now, but then writing down what you would rather have them look like.
Sasha Star Robertson 14:19
And I remember doing this last summer. The summers always tend to be really busy seasons for us. And tourist season here in Alaska. The Airbnb is always like really towards the top of my list because I’m constantly in messaging. I was cleaning our own Airbnb at the time, trying to find a cleaner, just doing so much, and that’s not the alignment that I wanted. I wanted more time for my family and health and getting outside and taking care of the home that we lived in and my business and time with God. And it just, that was not the alignment. So I had to sit down and say, Okay, what’s actually happening now and what would I rather see? And that’s one of the things that came up for me when you were speaking to that right now. What are we sacrificing for something else? We don’t have to be 100%.
Sasha Star Robertson 15:07
And I joined this really intensive program that I’m in right now as well. I found myself trying to do the family time, trying to do the God time, trying to do all the things while I’m giving this program 100%. And I don’t have 700% inside of me to do all the things and so just realizing What I was really sacrificing in my life was sleep. But you can’t do that and you can’t do that consistently without finding yourself in a state of burnout and all these other things not taking care of yourself. And so that was me as I was, I wouldn’t say idolizing anything necessarily. But I found myself that I was staying up too late working on certain things and then also getting up way too early. But I was getting up early and going straight into these training sessions, these workshops, and all this other stuff, that I was missing out on my quiet time with God and so I had to realign that and rein it in because at that point it was becoming an idol when I’m jumping out of bed and going straight for that and not have my quiet time with God.
Sasha Star Robertson 16:10
Another thing that you touched on was like I phrase it as never pray for patience. I don’t know if you’ve heard that phrase, but when you pray for patience, God is going to bring about things in your life that are going to teach you patience and cause you to exercise a great level of patience. And so I hear that in your Word of the Year in simplicity and in looking at what’s going on now. And I had the same thing a couple of weeks ago I was almost having this like, it was just a really poor mindset one evening. And I was lamenting to my husband over my calendar because I was looking at it in a certain way. And my husband’s like, What I’m hearing you say is you’re in a state now where you have everything that you’ve been praying for and everything that you’ve been working for? Your word of the year is abundance, and your calendar is abundant. I was reminded that I talk about full but fulfilling days. And I talk about a schedule filled with purpose. And that’s the exact point I was at but my mindset was wrong.
Sasha Star Robertson 17:13
And I was letting the enemy get to me and telling me it was a bad thing that I was not going to be able to sleep in three days a week or five days a week or whatever, you know, and I was just looking at it from the wrong perspective. And so I was grateful for all the coaching that I’ve been in and been doing that my husband’s picked up on because he took the opportunity to help coach me through that and so, I agree. My word of the year is abundance and that’s what God has been showing me in so many different areas. He has been bringing about abundance in my life. And so just reminding myself that yeah, my schedule is abundantly full. It is filled with all kinds of things that are fulfilling. I am having time in the gym, I am having time with Him. I’m having time with my spouse, with my family, working on my business podcasts, and all these other things. So it’s actually a really good thing.
Sasha Star Robertson 18:02
And then the last thing that you touched on that I wanted to talk about was chores. My son is only two and a half and he has chores. His responsibility is when he’s done playing with a toy, he needs to clean it up and put it back in the toy room before we’re gonna do a different toy. He’s already in the habit of that. Sometimes I don’t even have to tell him. He knows he needs to pick up all of his legos and take them back to the toy room before I’m gonna let him play with Play-Doh. He starts cleaning up all on his own sometimes. Another chore that he has is when he’s finished eating, he needs to throw the trash in the trash and put his plate and fork and cup and whatever in the sink and so even at a very young age, our kids can do chores. Whenever we transfer the laundry, he loves helping and want to go down there and put the stuff from the washer to the dryer. And so just allowing him to have that independence and autonomy over taking care of himself and his surroundings, his home.
Sasha Star Robertson 18:10
And so I love that you brought that up. They don’t get an allowance. Like, no, you need to learn how to be a good steward of your home and of your environment. Because that’s part of what we do in life and how we become good adults because nobody’s paying me to clean my house. Nobody’s paying me to do the dishes or my laundry so props to you. I love that you brought that up and gave that tip as well to delegate things to your family. I see many moms who don’t do that. And in terms of their own healthy eating, they’ve gotta cook different meals for their kids and I’m like your kids are eight and 10 like they can cook their meals if they don’t want to eat the chicken and vegetables that you’ve made for dinner. But I’ll stop I’ll stop harping on that one, but it’s very important to me that we’re setting our families up for success, especially our kids. And not just being that example but equipping them. So, Gabe, any final thoughts that you’d like to leave with the audience or any tips.
Gabe Cox 20:04
I think tip-wise, embrace the season you’re in. Embrace where you’re at. It doesn’t mean you have to stay there. We need to grow right and we grow by getting that time with the Lord. So my biggest tip really is if you’re feeling rushed, if you’re playing busy, if you’re feeling unbalanced, look at where you’re spending your time and see if you’ve given the Lord five minutes of your day. See if you’ve spent some time alone in prayer or in the Word. If you haven’t, my challenge for you is to start there and to give that five minutes of quiet so He can help balance you. And actually, here’s a tip I got from one of my friends. Her name’s Michelle, and I was talking about how busy I was and how my schedule was just kind of overwhelming because of a lot of things I do. I like to plan out my week on Sundays. I have a weekly meeting with myself and I plan out what it looks like. It looks crazy on the calendar, but I only look at the one day. I feel like you can tackle one day at a time. And it’s totally okay. Then I was kind of complaining and she said, Well, have you given that to God? Have you asked Him to take control of your schedule? And I was like, I guess I didn’t ever think about doing that. But I started doing it and I really have seen a blessing through it because if it’s on my schedule, most likely it’s because I have to do it.
Gabe Cox 21:30
We can do hard, right so even in our little day-to-day schedules we can do hard things. We’re called to do hard things, but we do hard things through His strength. Not through our own. And so, we need to ask Him to come into our schedule and ask Him to take over and take the wheel. That’s what I would leave as encouragement for your listeners today.
Sasha Star Robertson 21:50
Incredible. That’s so valuable, asking God to take control of your schedule. I’m taking that as well. As soon as we’re off here, I’m praying that. So thank you so much, Gabe. I know you guys have heard we have very similar God assignments and missions and goals in life but we are very much two different people. So I want you to tell us, Gabe, where can people find you and connect and listen to more of what God puts on your heart to share?
Gabe Cox 22:24
Absolutely. So I have a podcast called Red Hot Mindset and you can find all details and links on my website at redhotmindset.com. I have a fun facebook group called Simplicity and Motherhood, and that’s kind of where you can really engage with me.
Sasha Star Robertson 22:41
Love it. Well, I’m gonna drop links for her social media connections, podcasts, website, all of that in the show notes so you guys should be able to click and go straight there. And then last question, Gabe, what does intentional abundance mean to you?
Gabe Cox 22:59
I love this question and when you were asking me about it in the beginning, I was like oh, I need to come up with something good. But honestly, intentional abundance means to me that I am in alignment with my assignment from God and that I’m doing my best each day for Him. I’m not seeking perfection. I’m seeking excellence in the things I’m doing. Intentional to me means that I am being purposeful in the things I’m doing, in the things I’m adding, in the work I’m doing, and all that. And really finding that joy. Abundance to me means I almost think abundance is laughter and joy and really feeling that blessing. And I feel like we are most blessed when we are in the will of God and doing His purpose which right now is a season of motherhood but it’s also a season of learning what are your giftings and where is he calling and just walking in step every day with what that is.
Sasha Star Robertson 23:58
I love it so much because that is so different than what I’ve heard before but it’s just so good, further developing this understanding of intentional abundance. Thank you so much, Gabe. I love that you were one here. I love everything you shared. You definitely gave some tips and inspiration and encouragement to me today and I know our listeners as well. So, thank you so much, and I hope you all have a very blessed day.
More about your Podcast Host
Sasha Star Robertson is an Intentional Living & Biblical Mindset Coach for busy Christian moms, wife of 13 years to her best friend, boy mom (blessed by adoption), travel addict, and Jesus freak. She is the founder of The Intentional Abundance Co., curator of the Life & Goals Planner, & host of the Intentional Abundant Life Podcast.
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